zhè
suàn
shén
me
bi̅ng
qì
How does this count as a weapon?
(pronoun) this; these / (bound form) this; the (followed by a noun) / (bound form) this; these (followed by a classifier) (in this sense, commonly pr. [zhei4], esp. in Beijing)

= + : James II of England (zh) is carrying a heavy book (文) in the elevator's bathroom (e4). This (这) book is so heavy that his gladiator sandals (辶) are sinking deep into the sand.
to regard as / to figure / to calculate / to compute

= + + : In anthill's bathroom it's Susan Saint Bernard versus the Eye of Providence. The Eye of Providence figures that it has no chances against Susan Saint Bernard who yields two double-axes, while he has only a bamboo stick. He calculates that his chance of survival is rather low.
what? / something / anything
what
ten (used in fractions, writing checks etc) / assorted / miscellaneous
exclamatory final particle
interrogative final particle
suffix, used to form interrogative 什麼|什么[shen2 me5], what?, indefinite 這麼|这么[zhe4 me5] thus, etc

= 丿 + : Mahatma Gandhi wears a fake nose and wants to eat a banana on top of the elevator, but it's actually very hard to eat a banana when you're wearing a fake nose.
variant of 麼|么[me5]

= 丿 + : Mahatma Gandhi wears a fake nose and wants to eat a banana on top of the elevator, but it's actually very hard to eat a banana when you're wearing a fake nose.
surname Yao
youngest / most junior / tiny / one (unambiguous spoken form when spelling out numbers, esp. on telephone or in military) / one or ace on dice or dominoes / variant of 吆[yao1], to shout

= : Mnemonic symbol from 幺点, ace: an ace card.

= : Maud Younger is going to a poker tournament in the aorta. Before she enters, she hides an ace in her fake nose in front of the aorta.
weaponry / weapons / arms
soldiers / a force / an army / weapons / arms / military / warlike / CL:個|个[ge4]

= + : Brunhilde and the soldier visit a burial mound in front of the engine. It is round like a ball like the deceased inside. To commemorate the round fallen soldier they put up a big eight-ball.
device / tool / utensil / CL:臺|台[tai2]

= + : The Saint Bernard dog has been practising playing his bagpipe all day in the space station's bathroom. The Queen of Hearts is so annoyed that finally she grabbed a screwdriver as utensil to end this torture.